This week I am taking kind of a break from boys. That was a crazy two weeks and I don't know how helpful it was. So I am focusing on cleaning up the house since I only have one more month till we put it on the market. I gotta figure out where I'm going to go and I need to make Joe come over and clean the yard and the gutters up. Uggg not looking forward to all of that. Plus that means Joe won't need to stay with friends anymore and can actually get his own place by himself. I know I shouldn't care but I just wish he would realize at some point that he messed up...or at the very least that he misses me...even if it's only a little bit. I am also figuring out the school stuff -I have decided to get a second bachelors in Marketing instead of the teaching thing since they don't make too much more and to be honest who know when or even if I am going to have kids now. I am also shopping for some new clothes. I'm now down 18lbs from where I was when I found out Joe was cheating on me and I look so much better! I am also feeling more confident in sending Ben pictures and videos. I even had to go to the store to get more/new work out clothes! Yay!
Nick texted me last night saying how he had gone on a bad date and how he wished things had worked out with us. He then later in the night told me how they had to put down one of their dogs last night...and then this morning he apologized for being so emotional. I told him I get it and I'm sorry for his loss. I didn't tell him this but I am also sorry he is having a hard time finding some one. Life is hard by your self...at least it is when you have had that partner and had that comfort and then you lose it and you have to figure out how to be alone again. I'm not sure who has it better off... Nick, who has never known the feeling of the comfort of a partner or Me, some one who had it and lost it.
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